Being a caregiver for my parents is the hardest job I have every done. It takes a lot of patience and love. Having Bipolar & early stages of Dementia make it even harder. Now, things are getting harder.
Mom’s memory is getting worse. She’s 83 and it’s getting to point that I don’t know who she is. She’s nice one moment and then happy the next. Sometimes she acts like a little girl and sometimes she’s the devil himself.
Or, one minute she’s great and wants to go out to each, and then 5 minutes latter she doesn’t feel like it & goes to bed. At times, I don’t know who I’m talking to.
One night while reading mom appeared at my doorway. She looked very confused. She said, “I thought I was in the hospital.” I said, “No mom your home now.” She responded, “No, I’m suppose to be in the hospital!” She looked so confused. I got up and walked her to her room and put her to bed. It’s like she had no life at all. I’m pretty sure she has Bipolar with her different moods – up and down. She can sit there and rock back and forth playing with her hands and just crying. When I ask her what’s the matter she tells me she doesn’t know.
Mom has mentioned that she wished the lord would take her. She’s tired of living – she just sits in her chair all day long. She can’t stand to cook, because her knees hurt, and the arthritis in her hip is becoming unbearable. At times, with my Bipolar, I have a hard time dealing with it. I have early stages of Dementia and the two together doesn’t mesh. Sometimes the anxiety is so strong I feel like I’m trying to crawl out of my skin.
My dad as Vascular Dementia/Alzheimer’s, but he’s not as bad. He keeps himself busy all the time. He also has Sundowner Disease. I mean he can be really down. Both parents posture has changed – they hunch over and walk very slow.
I live with them and take care of them the best I can, but it’s getting harder. I just pray whatever happens God will be there for all of us. I constantly ask for directions and I know when the time comes he will be there.